Is it depression? – Enough is Enough

I am shattered. My self-confidence has decreased manifolds in these years. I am not happy about who I am. I don’t see the world as it really is or maybe I am seeing too much. I care too much. And all this really hurts. It is not that I am complaining because all this have happened because of me. The uncertainity, fears and the guilt above all the assumptions I mount on them kills me more. I am living in a fake world and I am wearing the fake mask which becomes black and more black as the time passes. Reasons can be uncountable but now this has to stop.. this has to go. It has been bloody 4 years in this menace and I can’t live like this anymore else I will be no more. God is with me then why I am afraid of myself and the society.. now I don’t want waste a second. Its not about moving on but its about the change. This will be tougher than the journey that I am writing about but the destination will be worth-living. Action starts today. I need everyone’s prayers. God help me.

I am also not happy with my blog’s template. If anyone can suggest a good template which goes with my mindset and this blog’s personality+title then it would be great. The last date for suggesting the template is 2nd July 2006.

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13 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Khawab
    Jun 28, 2006 @ 07:50:00

    no its not depression….
    yeh our “weakness is we care 2 much”

    jahan tak mask ki baat hai tu yahan sab logon ne mask charahe hove hain asal chare kahan nazar ate hain

    as for template….yeh i hate ur tempale black..dul n boring….
    sorry for being honest hahahaha

  2. GH
    Jun 28, 2006 @ 21:39:00

    This post has been removed by the author.

  3. GH
    Jun 28, 2006 @ 21:41:00

    Diloon ka sakon Allah kay zikar may hai.

  4. Raheel
    Jun 29, 2006 @ 06:35:00

    khawab, muje dusron se kia and I also hate my template.. zara please koi template suggest kareengi aap?

    gh, beshak!

  5. sid
    Jun 29, 2006 @ 21:58:00

    and this too shall pass.

    carin is good, but make u sure u dont hurt urslef. may Allah help u. 🙂

  6. Aamanna
    Jun 30, 2006 @ 11:12:00

    no one can be original here Raheel, log zinda nahee renhay daytay… and infact no one is origianl here….. some wear the mask of religion and use the religion as they want to use it ….. anyways , i completely agree with GH.
    secondly, template is just the face of ur blog, which is to me, is not important. the most important thing to me is the content of ur blog which is always too good ….. keep it up yaar…

    ciao

  7. Sara
    Jul 01, 2006 @ 17:48:00

    heyz,dont worry you will be fine,everything is going to be fine Inshallah;definetely u have our prayers.Be strong and this will pass too.:)Well change is alwayz hard but i hope u succeed in whateva u are planning now.:)

  8. Raheel
    Jul 02, 2006 @ 15:15:00

    sid, baat toh sahi hai lekin mushkil bhi hai.. amen

    aamanna, waisey sahi baat hai yaar lekin jo guilt hota hai for being not who you are.. uska kia karoon

    sara, amen

  9. Khawab
    Jul 06, 2006 @ 08:27:00

    kahan hoooooooo

    ek dunya tumain dondane ko nekal gai hai…..
    newspapers main tumhare lea ads bi deh deya hain…
    pata nahi kahan ho

  10. Unaiza Nasim
    Jul 07, 2006 @ 15:49:00

    aww!!
    i hope u understand how I can relate to it!
    I wish that we all come out of it!
    Seems like ive written this post

  11. Khawab
    Jul 11, 2006 @ 11:35:00

    uuffff
    aab aa bi jahoo…..
    i thought u r da regular bloger
    eerrr but guess i was wrong
    dead wrong….

    wapis aa jaho warna bohat bura ho ga…. :@

  12. Raheel
    Jul 13, 2006 @ 12:59:00

    Unaiza, kia karein time hi aisa chal raha tha.. ab sab acha nazar aaraha hai 🙂
    Kawab, temporary aa gaya 😉

  13. Trailady
    Jul 23, 2006 @ 19:16:00

    Raheel, I have been where you were when you wrote this post. The world has joy to offer, but it is overwhelmingly dark. It is often easier to get by wearing a mask and yet those who are honest in heart find this unnacceptable. So, courage to you in taking off the mask. I am also doing this. It is hard, but also necessary.

    Blessings be upon you. :o)

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